The morning was brimming with excitement, i was eager to dress up and look beautiful, for, after all i was meeting my long lost dearest friend, after so many years. Re checked myself in the mirror, “hmm not bad, not bad at all”!, and rushed out of the door.
There she was coming my way, I Literally ran towards her to give her a big bear hug.
She greeted me! “Hi sweetheart, long time huh! YOU LOOK SO DIFFERENT, HAVE YOU GAINED WEIGHT?!”
Another day, at an all girl’s brunch date!
While pulling each others legs, in jest, one of them asked her, “Hey till how long you want to fly like a free bird?!, High Time you grow your nest?!”.
She visits her friend over tea. Her friend’s Mom-in-law speaks!
“These modern girls i tell you, they just want to enjoy life, no sense of responsibility!. One becomes the kind of company one keeps!”.
I’m all excited and decked up for my cousin’s wedding, eager to meet my relations. There one of the aunts’ in our relation catches hold of me and says, “Your in-laws are too gentle to tell you this.” “If next time i don’t hear any good news, you will have it from me”.
At one of the official family get-together. One lady with a toddler in arms and a little girl next to her, trying to make a polite conversation with me, says “Hi! How many years you guys have been married?, No plans of kids yet?!”. “No no…, you must plan, else, what is the joy of living?!”.
You must be wondering as to why these abrupt, sentences; conversations. As to where am i leading or have i lost it?!
Some of you might even have guessed the topic too.
Well, well, well… These are some of the opening lines, greetings or well-being addresses that me and many Women like me hear, witness or bear on a day to-day basis.
Sometimes in the form of care; sometimes rightful advice; sometimes, jest or taunt and yet other times, out of mere curiosity or sheer boredom.
Today’s blog post is yet another one of heart ramblings but definitely not insignificant.
In a World full of civility, relationships, cordiality, certain expectations in regard to treating a fellow human being vis a vis his personal life is becoming a rarity of sorts.
If i may request you to remember how in a world where we were mere children… the art or i rather call mannerisms of greetings were like?!
We were brought up in such a way that it was pertinent to be careful not to hurt anyone’s sentiments by way of action or words.
We were taught and and taught rather well, never to cross the line of polite concern or getting too personal.
I thought we had learnt well.
But i’m appalled, rather aghast to see the stark shift in progressive society of ours. In terms of everything, i believe and understand, we have come a long way. But in terms of mannerisms, if i talk as such, i think now, that we were better off before.
I’m neither a doctor nor a science expert…, so this blog post does not document my medical struggles, victories or failures… But the post rather talks about the battles of the Emotional nature, more so, of Societal Judgements.
And yes, I call myself a Survivor, a Warrior; at least in my eyes and i dare to represent a section of Men and Women in this regard.
Dealing with a medical condition of your loved ones or your own, is on its own a tough period to go through physically, financially and emotionally… But on top if it.. If one faces direct or indirect judgements; probings; insensitive questioning; it can lead to undue duress; cause misery and may lead to mental breakdown as well. Disrupting further, the already disturbed equilibrium of a situation, family or person.
But in our society it’s sort of taken to interfere or have at least keen interest into the personal matters of closed doors.
I’m not here to familiarise you or seek sympathies by telling the gruesome details of the medical conditions or the treatments.
I’m rather here, to pen down my grievance regarding the matters of Judgement, Bias, Shaming and Insensitivity on the part of a sophisticated society, myself, and lot many fellow survivors are from.
The issue of infertility is stigmatised to a level that it either becomes a taboo to address or is hinted at in hushed tones, or taunting voices.
From a personal and long understanding of the whole dynamics of the situation of people, or couple or women, battling infertile condition, i must say its more of a Social condition.
Its not a story; mentality; belief, restricted to one community, area, faith, country or religion.
We have been brought up or conditioned in a way that says that facing difficulties in conception; inabilities to conceive naturally; having to seek medical monitoring/intervention in this regard… is a matter of shame, disgrace, a pity; a lack and talking about it openly is accepting defeat. Its something to be dealt with in hiding; behind closed doors; in secrecy.
The pressure from the kith ‘n’ kins, the so called inner circle of love looms the largest; the topic is either completely ignored; advised to be kept underwraps or only hinted provocatively. So much so that humans, couples, specially women facing it, start alienating; feel the ostracism. So much so that it becomes a reason for marital discord, battles with the familial hierarchies, family rejections, rights, often leading to divorces and forced separations.
From there starts, the social distancing; anti-social behaviour so much so that i have seen my fellow warriors ending up in hiding and depression.
I’m not trying to give this issue a Feminist turn. But from where i stand i do honestly feel that the BLAME GAME is real and traumatic for Women.
We the infertility survivors really do feel like a minority within a minority at times!
The struggle is real, needs strength and grit to not fall prey to the feeling of a lack.
The irony is that the pain is more emotionally felt, rather than physical, despite the painful procedures! And more so, because strangely, the Insensitivity comes largely from our own Gender.
Our mothers and daughters of this powerful Avatar of a Woman; Women who have borne witness to the worst prejudices; women who have stood against the wrath of times and continues to battle for their rights till today; women who bear testimony to all that could be harsh, brutal and cruel. Its strange that the ones who can be a source of power to the fellow sisters, often tend to shun them and make them feel lacking or to be blamed!!
In the name of society, tradition, culture, family name, lineage, their behaviour often sums up to be discriminating, insulting and biased.
Why is it that if ever a question in this regard is asked, its only to a Woman? Why is it that only a woman falls prey to prying eyes, or becomes the topic of a discussion or is given all sorts of advises; admonishing and scathing remarks?
I don’t say this from a biased heart towards Male gender. I speak only from my experiences in particular and of my fellow couples whom i have spoken to, at great lengths. Of Course, in muted tones, behind closed doors.
MY WAITING ROOM INTERACTIONS!
Over the years i have often found myself Waiting!
For most part of any bright, cheerful day!
Waiting in crowded corridors with empty hopes; cold waiting rooms of strict silenced clinics! Bare feet but not bare feels! Sometimes alone, sometimes with your spouse but mostly lost in the crowd. Somedays its like a swarm of women, all sorts, shapes, looks, mind yet all of them having same look in their eyes! Mostly of guarded eyes, silenced lips and open ears.
But then there are some bored to death, always chatty, the ones the whole room can’t ignore even if they wish to kinds’, like me… foolishly looking all happy, excited and hopeful in the dingy waiting room.
I forged friendships out of long periods of waiting, or maybe the similar situations helped… And they spoke and spoke their hearts out.
I found many out of us women have lacked safe places to all their stories and to construct a positive meaning about their autobiographical narrative within their marriages, families friendships, workspace etc. Hence they all turn inward.
Sometimes overwhelmed by their situation –Defeated;
Sometimes accepting it as a negative fate –Resigned;
or Ignoring it and assuming an unrelated identity –Denying.
But all of us have questions, tons of them.!! Maybe to the society we live in.
First of all, to have a child or not is the sole and complete prerogative of a couple.
And in circumstances leading to infertility, the future decisions solely theirs.
Being treated for Infertility is like being treated for any other medical conditions say, diabetes, jaundice or something else… then Why the Stigma?! Why the silence? Why the Shame?!
From time to time i have myself revisited many stages of my own understanding and interpretation of fertility and have reconstructed my narrative of WHO I AM! in this light.
I do have the capacity to see myself from a distance and be an impartial observer.
During the initial phase of knowledge and acknowledging of this situation; then the choice of seeking treatments; the decisions undergoing procedures or not; the success and failures of it. In all this and much more…, I have felt the presence of dark depressive forces of self doubts, alienations, mood swings, hiding into a shell all around me. But thank heavens, never overpowering me. Because i knew My Worth. I had the confidence to love myself no matter what. I had the strength of character to see my beauty. And also i had a safe heaven, my inner circle of love, and my partner to share my experiences with. And hence, my narrative is just the way it ought to be.
‘Am i just my Womb?!’ Will all that is to me becomes insignificant in front of this one sudden alteration in my persona??
Is child bearing an only ultimate yardstick to a successful matrimony?
Motherhood, the greatest joy of Womanhood is restricted only to biological chords?
Can it not manifest itself amongst the ties of heart?
What good or what greatness is it of then, if not unconditional?
Such questions and many more…
Coming back to me, i am perennially a happy go lucky; eternally hopeful; hopeless romantic; highly expressive human. I don’t get dettered much or rather easily by the circumstantial change within or without. The survival instinct is strong and hence, the urge to keep going Happily in life everafter.
Opinions of others do hurt sometimes but don’t matter at all. What rather affects is the distress, pain caused by my situation to my loved ones.
So when people judge the course of my life, my decisions, my lifestyle or what not, i generally ignore big time. But when it starts affecting my loved ones, i sit upright and answer back.
Remember people, you are not in my shoes, hence you don’t get to decide. Period!!
There is so much more to me than just one condition. There is so much to be done in life and so much to be grateful about. I carry my heart on my sleeves and intend to do so all my life. I have been blessed to have a friend for a partner who shares the same zest for life as me. Our decisions have been mutual and struggles too. And what lies in future too shall find us in togetherness ever so more.
But then there are my fellow sisters and brothers who are battling severe distress, loneliness and agony in their lives. So the world around us that is the so called educated society of sophistication (not considering the scenario of superstitious/remote thought process here at least), we need to buckle up on sensitivity and kindness. We need to create an atmosphere of an open dialogue. There should be acceptance from both ends. The taboos and shame should be dispelled. The onus of mental and emotional well being lies with each one of us. If we would talk openly and not indirectly, in remarks, a better understanding would prevail. And this would reduce anxiety and depression amongst the already suffering.
Also, suffering from a medical condition does not yearn for sympathy but that also does not mean that life should stop for the one… It should not be a Taboo… The life goes on, and if that one person enjoys life with zest and happiness and has accepted or moved on, no one has the right to Judge… No one deserves to be Judged for Trying to have a happy life, for dreaming further. Or on the basis of their decisions.
If you cannot understand it, at least do not dare condemn.!!
This blog post will be an abrupt end or rather one without an end, for my experiences won’t end here definitely. It’s going to be a long journey and a long ending one. But i’m hopeful the change in the attitudes and sensitivity will occur, if not radically then gradually.
If even one person reading this blog post will gain an insight and a better understanding into the emotional nature of the situation and will exhibit some sensitivity, i shall feel all this worthwhile.
Upon getting only a week’s holidays at hand, and a dire need to escape into another world from ours, we decided to make the most of it by travelling to someplace nearby. The name AAPNO RAJASTHAN reverberated in unison, and hence, zeroed on. It is a state that resonates INDIAN ETHOS at its purest and most embracing; ROYALTY of yesteryears redefined and served to your heart’s content and majestic grandeur and rich cultural heritage to fill your sights and mind for years to come.
Travel Partner Who?
WE BOTH KNEW ONCE WAS NEVER ENOUGH! Hence, we were TRADITIONALLY YOURS, O’ LAND OF RAJPUTANA, for a week.
It was a revisit for the both of us, though we were going to colour ourselves together in this experience for the first time.
You must be wondering, my referral to “WE“…. so before moving ahead let me introduce you to the other me who completes my “WE”…. My Companion, my co- traveler, friend, guide, photographer … a Naval OFFICER by profession; photographer and artist by passion; and bitten by TRAVEL BUG …JUST LIKE ME – TILAK!
Udaipur -City of Lakes
Rangeela Rajasthan, so rightfully said isevery inch a colourful experience, every corner has a story of Proud Palatial Regalia; sagas of bravery; tales of unrequited romance; songs of nomadic folklore and dance of the dunes which being Rajputs ourselves, drew us like a magnet to the royal land.
These majestic sights and places once, become a part of you, they never leave your soul. You carry a piece of them in your heart and memoirs wherever you go.
However, making a quick itinerary wasn’t that difficult, we, each knew at once the places we wanted to revisit, the places that kept callingus back, the places we had faint memories of, however, etchedfondly in our hearts.
This timehowever, it was going to be different for now we have changed, we live with abetter perspective; a deeper vision and a knack for details, a hunger for travels persists. FOR We…. Have tasted WANDERLUST like never before; we want to explore GOD’s canvas and want to find our true calling; we are now in pursuit of zenith, for we now are TRAVELLERS… OF THE GLOBE!!
We instantly booked our flight tickets from Aamchi MUMBAI and landed in UDAIPUR!! An early morning flight brought us to the bewitching city at 9:00 am in the morning. As per the week’s itinerary, our first halt that we had most desirously chosen was JAG MANDIR!
We had a whole day of exploration planned ahead of us and O’ Boy were we any less excited!!
A day Well Planned
SO, My Dear Readers, this blog post is about our visiting to one of the most breathtaking places of ROYALinheritance; aesthetic presence; grand historical eloquence and architectural marvel: JAG MANDIR of Udaipur city, Rajasthan.
What History Says?
It is a palace, also known as the LAKE GARDEN PALACE, built on an island in the Lake Pichola. It is credited be built during reign ofthree Sisodia Rajput Maharanas of Mewar and hence, named “JAGAT MANDIR”, in honour of the last ruler, Maharana JagatSingh (1628 -1652). This place speaks volumes of the grandeur and leisure of the royalty. It was used as a pleasure palace for holding huge parties and was a summer resort for the royal family and guests.
This palace is also famously remembered as a refuge asylum given by our Rajputana Mewar kings to prince Khurram, later came to be known as famous Shah Jahanand his wife Mumtaz Mahal, in annals of history. A portion of this palace, initially built specially for Khurram was known as GUL MAHAL. Its one of the most remarkable structure of great architectural glory by Mewar dynasty and was built quite unusually than other relics. It is said to be believed that this palace came to be the inspirationbehind conceptualisation of eighth wonder of the World, Taj Mahal; Built by Shah Jahan in the loving memory of his wife Mumtaz Mahal.
What we wore?~
I deliberately chose to style my outfit of the day befitting the occasion and place of visit. Bringing out the every bit of Rajputani that exists in me and fusing it with classic contemporary traveller, this is what I wore:
I paired my ethnic gheradaarneon lehriya skirt/ghagra with a classic black knot shirt and a pair of my most comfortable red boots,[the perfect choice as we had long walks ahead of us!]; ethnicaccessories and metallic bag pack to carry my essentials for the day.
AND I SET OUT TO EXPERIENCE EVERY BIT A QUEEN EVERY WOMAN DESERVES TO BE!!
Tilak chose to wear, a cool pair of co-ords, a commando black tee with detailing laces and super comfy and stylish joggers; paired with his most favourite military boots! keeping in mind his behind the lens activities and long day ahead.
How we reached Jag Mandir ?
We embarked on our small trip, super excited and landed in UDAIPUR, after merely two hours of rest we couldn’t wait any longer and headed towards CityPalace & reached its BANSI GHAT jetty We bought tickets at the corner ticket counter,the prices of which differ from morning to evening hours; as we went in the morning ferry, it costed us Rs 400/- per person. It is however, advisable to go in the morning itself, specially if you have a bigger travel group as charges are higher in the evening hours. Also, you get more time in hand to enjoy the island palace and hotel exerience at leisure.
We waited for about twenty minutes for the ferry to begin the tour to the island palace. The weather Gods seemed pleased with us too, as it was a gorgeous, breezy day.
This ferry ride is the most magical and soothing ride that traverses across the LAKE PICHOLA, while showcasing the magnificient scenes of the ghats and city palace all around you. The experience i believe is similar, to the romantic Venetian lakes and boat rides.
The palace jetty is the first striking scene of majestic grandeur that welcomes you and leaves you spellbound. The elegant facade includes brilliantly carved four elephants on either side alluring you to much more promisingsights and architectures.
Upon entering the first thing that amazes and beholds you is the marvellous crown shaped domes of GUL MAHAL, built in yellow sandstone, three circular domed chambers, two marble chhatris, giving it a Mughal architectural style. We couldn’thelp but marvel at the craftsmanship and refined taste of those times.
It felt every bit a Paradise for people who love Art, Architecture and Photography!!
We felt so at peace yet excited to soak in the entire experience and the royal vibe and capture every bit of this beauty into our lens.
We decided to stay longer than we had intended.
I lovedthe fact that the pavilion upon entering the palace, a gorgeous white colonnade carved with crisp arches marks the periphery of the island with a scenic back drop of Aravallihills and opens up to THE GARDEN COURTYARD and the DARIKHANA on its northern side.
Walking along thehuge GARDEN COURTYARD amidst roses, frangipani trees, bougainvillea, palm trees was invigorating and brought in a sense of peace to your being. Despite many tourists, there was a very respectable silence around; one felt enchanted and transported to a not so distant world of kings and queens and felt every bit a part of them.
The courtyard is a classicmake of black and white tiles that leave a resonating effect on your senseswith its fountains and waterpools, low marble handrails, crisscross walkways bedecking the garden surroundings mesmerising your entire experience.
A flock of pigeons can be seen fluttering, playing around the whole areas and tempt you to capture them in your frames for sure, and i too couldn’t resist the temptation either!
DARIKHANA, an open sided terrace built with marble columns, is now being used as a lovely restaurant for tourists and private parties.
Incorporating GUL MAHAL is the prestigious main palace the JAG MANDIR. It is a masterpiece of sheer elegance, its tower ,an octagonal in shape, topped with dome shaped, weather proof, cupolas. It encompasses many interconnected residential suites, reception halls and The Zenana -residence of royal ladies chambers, built in great Rajput and Mughal architectural styles!
Also, one cannot fail to mention the beauty of THE KUNWAR PADA ka Mahal, the palace of the Crown Prince, located at the western end of the island.
‘The Palace of The Twelve Stones” or Bara Patharon ka Mahal, situated at the eastern wing of the main palace is yet another architectural brilliance carved out of twelve marble slabs. It indeed was the highlight of the entire architectural marvel.
We really had an amazing time wandering in and around the labyrinth of the island palace; gaping and gasping looking at the detailed craftsmanship and enjoying the halo of the royalty. Loitering around we went into the section where a mini museum was built and relics of yesteryears historical importance were kept there to depict the significance of the times immemorial.
As we toured ever inch of this gorgeous relic , enjoying the scenic galore; capturing moments, we decided to take a breather and check out their restaurants and cafe menus and services as well. A Coffee date amidst the royal gardens seemed the most apt choice to rejuvenate.
The menu was crisp and uncomplicated, not with too many options as well. Good, selective beverages and some cosmopolitan dishes to order. The prices were on the bit expensive side but good for one time experience. As we were not hungry we did not go for the dining services. Though we checked out the details for future references. The five star hotel diner looks warm and cozy with a perfect view to look at. For a fine dining experience, one needs to reserve a table on telephone. The menu comprises of Rajasthani and international cuisines served in utmost royal regality. A meal for a couple could cost approximately around Rs 5500/-. Food can be best experienced here in the evening as dinner to experience the fully lit ambience and atmosphere of this Royal heritage at its best with lighting and music though the service is a bit slow. However, to relish the cuisines there are far better places in the town and budget friendly too and this experience can be given a miss on the island.
After the much needed break, we set out to, we set out to see one last straw of this island and that is the garden on the eastern side of the island. I fell in love with this portion of the island that had so much beauty, tranquility and grandeur to offer to its visitors and on-lookers.
We started roaming in this beautiful garden and enjoying the breezy scenes the lake provided. One could see at the shore and marvel at yet another royal architectural marvel CITY PALACE from here and a art of the Udaipur town on the shores as well. Also, couldn’t help but gape at the white beauty of the HOTEL LAKE PALACE, Standing tall and graceful in its glory.
AND then amidst all these scene searching, i found my favourite place to perch and click umpteenth pictures. I’m talking about the most talked about marble takht out in the garden, onlooking scenes of lake Pichola and the entire city of Udaipur, such beautifully carved and strategically placed chair.
In yesteryears Maharaja and the Maharani’s of the Mahal ,must have spent a quality time here, amidst serenity and romance.
This chair literally led me to day dream and envision the mystic era gone by.
I Sat on the marble chair to my heart’s content and soaked in the Royal feels and the beauty around me to last a lifetime .
Have i told you this before….i often feel i’am an OLD WORLD SOUL trapped inside a new day body. The era’s gone by, their lifestyle, thoughts; poetry; architecture; music; mysticism; larger than life caricatures; language have always fascinated me and i feel difficult to disconnect once, in that zone.
Anyhow, dusk was slowly spreading its wings and the whole island was being prepared to be lit for the approaching night. It was time to take the ferry back to the city of Lakes.Rejuvenated , satiated and at peace we alighted the ferry bidding our adieu to the Island Palace and to enjoy the cool ferry ride across the lake.
Excited and Happy at the phenominal beginning of the trip and making plans for the day 2 of the vacay we sailed through.
Want to know how our rest o the trip went? and if you are keen to know my experiences though the rest of the journey! Stay tuned and kee watching this space for more.
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I am a learner! I seek ! I seek and i observe and i imbibe. I learn better from characters and personas, than life in general. They have a way of leaving their imprints on my heart more than any lessons ever learnt.
Hence, i’m constantly seeking Inspiration. Inspiration from Men, Women and Children around me. For i truly believe, anyone, really anyone can suddenly appear on the canvas of your life and can be the inspiration for you to draw; whatever it is you are meant to.
Well, i had been mulling since long to introduce you to few people that have been a constant source of learning for me, they have in many aspects at some or the other way touched my life at some given point.
The list is almost endless!
But as I saw the day 8th March which we all celebrate as “International Women’s Day“approaching .I thought no more procrastinating,let’s do it!
Each and every passing day as i hold my pen tight and loosen out my emotions; i experience things like never before. I am beginning to understand and value every emotion, every persona much lucidly and vividly. I get lost into the depth of my soul only to find myself much more!
I used to think and feel a lot but i have become a lot more accepting of my feelings and i’m conveying them way lot more than ever before.
So,Yes ! Now is the right time for me to convey and value what each of these WOMEN have taught me and inspired me by truly being themselves and truly believing in themselves.
This time I introduce you to four beautiful Women in my life, who may not have started any feminist movements; nor are their names to be reckoned Worldwide; yet they are Every bit of The Unsung HEROES of my life and have inspired me to be Truly, Madly, Myself!
So, This Women’s Day i make a dedication to them and many more Women for being themselvesin the knitty gritty, mundane everyday lives and yet having a “VOICE“; having the power and the sensibilities of living their lives with panache and fighting their own little battles in ways best known to them; They are Survivors; they are Winners; they are Inspirers. They have fallen many times only to get up and move on.Not only do they stand for themselves, they are a Sisterhood; they have stood for anyone and everyone they believed in; pulling up each other all along the ways of life; teaching and imparting; knowingly or unknowingly!
I salute my Women Heroes; for teaching me to Be the Voice for Self and for anyone who needs; for I marvel at their SMILES ALONG WITH THEIR SCARS; For they carry it like WARRIOR MARKS!!
For you don’t need a greater issue to stand up for; or for a World War battle to be known; or to propagate a cause; to be a Hero.
By Calling them a hero, I do not mean to resort to flattery of any sort; nor do i wish to worship and idolize them. They are various things in this little life and play many roles of a Mother; Daughter; Wife; Career woman; homemaker and what not. Some roles come easy to them and some not so easy. To err is human! They are not Devi’s but Everybit as Real and As Human as one can be; with all the attributes good; bad or better and we are not here to judge or pass verdicts! (As it is i don’t get what is on with our world; we jump at every oppurtunity to put any being into brackets; brackets of so called “saints”, or “Evils”. Why can’t we be simply human and appreciate whatever good we see in others).
We are here to celebrate their stories and in any which way they have touched my life and many others.
So, Ladies and gentlemen I bring to you my first Hero.
Her name is Pradnya Shende.
I met her around four years ago and ever since she has been an integral part of me now. A marathi girl from a small village somewhere near, Nagpur (Maharashtra), a very bright, intelligent and an ever smiling, good looking girl. She had something in her that caught my attention first…. like me, she was a dreamer, and always found reasons to be happy.
Well, we met on my second day in Karanja, Mumbai, we had shifted our house a day ago and i was sitting confused amidst tons of packed luggage, when my doorbell rang. Wondering who could it be, as I didn’t know a soul there, i opened the door and saw this beautiful tall girl of around 22/23 years of age ; impeccably dressed, and a smiling face. She had sad eyes though. I was literally taken aback, when she asked if i was looking for a domestic help. She said she needed the servant quarters urgently. There was an honesty in her smile and pain in her eyes. I at once said yes! The very next day Pradnya came to stay with us along with her little son and ailing husband.
She took care of my household and we became friends. Soon, she was my companion everywhere and her little son Krishna became my playmate and my student.
Pradnya was a 12th class dropout, financial circumstances at her home led her to leave education so that her brother could study and she gave in to get married at the age of 19! A bigger farmers home and little better off, she sought happiness in the fact that she will pursue her studies soon and support her parents too. Soon, her dreams took back seat and the immediate problems took centre stage. Her doting husband was an addict of gambling and alcohol and was wasting away all that the family had. There were debts and tensions amidst the pressure to conceive. And one day her husband had a facial paralysis attack. Suddenly, how a little girl who loved gorging on pani-puri’s, reading books and dreamt of a job, had her world, turned all topsy turvy.
She took a decision, against everyone’s will and brought her husband away from all easy and ill habits; to Mumbai. Soon she realized, life was much more difficult than she had fathomed. She once again gave up her education dream for the time being and came for a shelter to work in defence colony as a domestic help. She had to earn enough to help her husband recover and rehabilitate and any other job was out of question for the time being. Always busy in studies, she had never taken much interest in household chores but now took care of four homes in a day.
Her husband recovered and swore to lead a healthy life; took on a small job; life felt back on track and then her son was born. But happiness was short-lived for them and once again, she found herself from doors to doors when her husband had a massive heart attack. She had to keep her home afloat and her husband alive .
I offered help, she said, “didi get me more work if you want to help“. I at, that time was designing lot of fancy clothes for an upcoming wedding at home and noticed her interest and got to know she could stitch some basics. I enrolled her in a stitching class and brought her work from anywhere i could. I would buy tons of fabric, give her the designs, make her redo the work wherever she erred but she persevered and learnt and learnt. Her life was a waking work station, as she juggled between working as house help, her son, hospital and stitching; somewhere i saw the dreamy girl turn into a Woman of the world. But her smile never ceased her.
And one day it all came to a grinding halt! A wrong operation at a government hospital, her husband couldn’t survive. Here, I had brought books for her 12th class exams and she was being taken by her in laws to her village and to be remarried to her unemployed brother-in-law. I thought we both had almost given up on our dreams of a better life for her. One night i received her call, “Didi can me and Krishna come back? His final exams are approaching. And i have my stitching test too?” I was in tears and over joyed.
She came back trying to stitch her life back. Everyday the struggle to live in the same room with her hùsband’s memory; defying all decisions of remarriage; taking all the blames of a son lost; I saw her strength, determination let large. Breaking down or crying doesn’t mean you have surrendered, rather it cleanses you and rids you of your burdens and firms your to stand up and keep going.
Today, Pradnya is an independent seamstress, continues to work as househelp too, she’s saving money to do a designing course; her son is a well brought up scholarship student studying in Kendriya Vidyalay and a Karate enthusiast and yes, She’s appearing for her twelfth class exams , supports her old in-laws and her parents. And that smile is back. SHE IS EVERY BIT MY UNSUNG HERO! She taught me that how when adversity falls, you got to survive; how no work is small or big and how dreams even though sometimes need to be put on hold, one should not stop working towards them; she taught me there is no time to play the victim if you have decided to be a Warrior and HOW SHE WAS COMPLETE EVEN WITHOUT ANY MAN! SHE IS THE WOMAN OF HER HOME! She has taught me to SMILE through adversity and this too shall pass.
MY SECOND HERO WHO INSPIRED AND TOUCHED MY LIFE is RITI JAMWAL
We are what they say, “Soul Sisters ” are!
We are so Different from each Other! An exact opposite of each other!
Yet one fine day during our Plus two phase, our souls found each other.
I’m a dreamy, nerdy, full of myself; incessant chatterbox; fashionable diva; go getter; extremely social, energy explosive kind of girl who has an opinion about everything in this world. I love to plan and dream about, sometimes worry too, about future.
And She is this quiet, observant, patient; tomboyish; headstrong; rough-tough girl with her mood swings and a perfect laid back approach to life; she would always listen to her heart and gave a shit about what the world thought of her. She loved to go out, travel and have fun with friends; laughter, food and cooking are her life binge….., books repel her and outdoors are her love. She took one day at a time and never planned her life.
I wonder what struck a chord then! We never have ever professed best friend love notes; neither we are those PDA, HUGGING, KISSING TYPE GIRLFRIENDS! We are more of SISTERS, taking each other for granted, as to always have each other’s back.
Our bond grew manifolds when Once, during our twelfth board exams My Mom and my Brother met with a major accident. It was the toughest time for me as me being a very Serious student ,was not in the right frame of mind and neither was my home conducive to study at that time. More so, my both pillars from whom i drew strength were so badly wounded and i was scared for them. She, at once came home with her mom and bhai and they insisted to take me along with them to stay till exams. I had never stayed with anyone like this before,i was apprehensive but this was the best decision we made. From then on started the ritual of group studies and always staying together , either at hers or mine place. And boy , am i glad!!
One another hilarious incident that comes to my mind … it was again the time for exams , me being me; very serious about time table and syllabus and scoring ;and Riti being her laid -back chilled out self. We had major issues while prepping…. i would wake up whole night and finish studies and revisions and would force her to do so ,and She, on the other hand, would not compromise her sleep for the World ,let alone a petty exam!!She would lie down in my lap , book on her face and would make me recite lines or read points ,pretending to listen, while all the while she would be in lala land taking a cat nap!!!
We have a long standing friendship; with obviously, its ups and downs. I have not liked some of her life choices and she mine! But that’s perfectly alright! We were never together to please each other but an unsigned pact of supporting each other remains…., but hilariously we have never made up after a fight or an argument😛; we take each other so much for granted that we know for a fact, we’ll be behaving normally on the next call!
Once, in examination hall ,she finished her exam almost half an early and went outside the hall to enjoy ; i was the one who was ambitious of the two and and would keep on writing till the last minute ,the whole time in my heart i kept on wondering, what happened to Riti! Upon enquiry i found out she ,out of sheer laziness ,had not bothered to check the other side of question paper and had left an entire set of question!!But she laughed and laughed and i as always, worried for her!
This has become one of the most famous incidents among us all!She was carefree,relaxed ;chilled out and happy go lucky but always scored well and did so well for herself in life! She taught me to take it easy in life!What’s yours,no one can take it away from you!
We both have been two Strongly Opinionated Women but it was never necessary to agree on everything, we understand each other’s space and respect each other’s viewpoints.
We have had some amazing years of fun, laughter & carefree youth; those were the times everything was about Friendship and having a great time. But also, of understanding life and relations in a better perspective. Together, we have seen a lot! Life changed and we girls blossomed into Strong Independent Women with a world of our own…., yet we stand by each other or, atleast know we are there anytime and everytime to fall back on, if the need be.
I so fondly remembered the times when we were inseperables
I have a perennial love for literature and She wanted to join Belt forces. And boy! She did what she set her heart on; with her fair share of hurdles and obstacles.
She was posted far away from home but never far away enough from my life.
I remember how sudden untimely demise of her father had brought our world upside down, and how devastated everyone at home was and there She was, miles away from us in those eastern hills; coping with the news and planning a return home!
She came home and held the fort like a tigress, calming all of us down! I remember she consoled and wiped my tears instead! And till date i marvel at her strength, poise and calmness. She is Brave and She’s Strong. And in all of this, she never stopped living her life to its fullest. I’m not saying she’s perfect nor any of us is or born to be! But She Inspires!
While serving the nation, She found love in another Braveheart of our country. They married and settled down only to realise, its never really settling down with both being posted at different corners of the country.
With the birth of her daughter Arshia, A mother was born! A side of her persona which i could never fathom before, surfaced! A need to nurture and Motherhood overpowered the soldier woman in her. And i guess the time was right but the decision, definitely not easy. Yet again I witnessed a Resolve. A resolve to give up everything to raise her daughter and be a Home maker, the toughest job in the world. I can well understand the dilemmas of a mind & heart when it comes to making choices in life, as i too have rocked in the same boat. But Once, decided We move ahead smiling, never to look back and regret.
She showed me another side of Today’s Dynamic, independent powerful Woman! A warrior and a nurturer! A woman who can evolve and shape up to be whoever, her life needs her to be. That there is not a particular time for dreaming; that we can move on from one dream to another; that its never too late to change the course of life; that its okay to keep on treading new paths to try different roles; that its okay to not fit into stereotypes types or competitions, To be A woman After one’s ❤ Heart.
That life is not a Race, nor do we have to prove ourselves to anyone. We should just know Who We Are! And Be Comfortable in our Being! That life can be lived at its Best, with a laid back approach.
She’s a proud mama of a proud daughter with a Strong Head and StrongerVoice; her home and life is every bit a reflection of her and She keeps experimenting with amazing recipes and offlate, giving a lot of time to her admirable Art work of tribal paintings and what not and maybe, acting little girly and playing dress up after all! Thank Lords!
Jokes Apart! I love her for Being herself and never surrendering to the dictats of the societal pressure to look best; to follow fashion trends; or to follow all girly things that didn’t fancy her. The tomboyish look might have mellowed down on the outside but on the Inside She’s every bit of the tom boy rebel she once was! And yes she’s my Unsung Hero!
Let Me introduce you to my third Hero for today, Our’s is a new found relationship,a journey that has just begun but already i have so much respect and Awe when i look at her!
Her Name is Shalu kisan Rao Khandekar, and she chose to keep her father’s Sirname!
“Shalu Didi” as i fondly call her, She came to stay with me as a house caretaker some six months ago, even though we shifted houses, she came along with me, along with her son and daughter!
A tall, sturdy Woman with a graceful, mature and happy face. Although she’s almost nearby my age, but her demeanour exhibits a strong strength of character and the fact she has seen a lot! It feels a lifetime has passed by when she reminiscizes but in the present She laughs and and laughs and acts like a kid younger than her children.
The first day she came looking for work and i at once knew, she will be part of my life for coming years. And as we sat for our evening tea together, it felt as if i knew her from long before.
Her’s is a sordid tale of gruesome Abuse, molestation, poverty and domestic violence. Poverty stricken parents married her off at 18 and she was brought beaten mercilessly to work as a house maid by her alcoholic husband. She kept on working and kept on taking the abuse till the time her children came into being and for a time, for them. She held on till the time her husband attempted to murder her child and throw her from top floor of a building and tried kidnapping her the other time. Such was her own condition that if she had tolerated a bit more she would have succumbed to the wounds of body and agony of her heart and scars of her psyche.
She Decided!TO CHANGE HER DESTINY ! …TO BE THE CHANGE!
Coming from that conservative strata of society, she was mentally, emotionally rebuked, accuse, disowned and what not but she stood her ground! She divorced her husband and filed a case too. Of course, some really good people helped her, gave her work, shelter, support and much needed guidance. Single handedly, she raised her children, gave them good education and good life. Ofcourse, from time to time she faced and still is facing many hardships…., she’s over worked and finances are still low. Men still try to pounce like vultures upon seeing a single woman; she has been lectured often on societal morals; and how a single woman cannot live her life and be safe. She has declined some decent offers of matrimony and defying all odds has Chosen To Live Her Life Full Circle, Just The Way She Wants!! PEACEFUL, INDEPENDENT AND HAPPY!
She says she’s really proud of her one decision that day and now knows, what living a life really means! She says She has Tasted freedom! It tastes like Laughter! She’s A Survivor! She’s A Warrior Queen!
Her story is like a million others’ in our country or worldwide. Yet what inspires me is not how she stood up, but how she lives her life of dignity now!! I always hear sounds of giggles and uproarious laughter from their room. She and her children are so in tune with each other, so transparent and so close; such enthusiastic life lovers!! I am Amazed!!
I feel as if her children without understanding much at that point still understood her completely, as if they lived every moment through her pains and her crises! They are so kiddish and yet so mature; they live like three siblings together and “Shalu didi”, never feels the need of a companion. The kids always goof around and make her laugh as if they are silently making up for all the tears she has ever shed. She Inspires!! They Inspire!!
I for the first time have realised in life how inspite of having so little you can have all. How no worry is bigger than a sound sleep and Hope of a new Dawn! How one can never have enough of material wants but can have all the happiness of the World!!
How its Best to not take Life too seriously! ! And No tension in the world is worth giving up your sleep or peace for!
That however, less you have on your plate, sharing fills you up! And the less you have, the bigger your Heart becomes!
I’m loving staying with this extended family of mine and learning from them HOW TO LIVE ONE DAY AT A TIME!!!! AND NO PROBLEM IS BIGGER THAN YOUR FAITH! If my problem seems bigger to me, i should look around and say a PRAYER of THANKS!! Yes, She’s my Unsung Hero!
And Now I talk About My Ultimate Inspiration, for whom Word’s fall short and i can go on and on for another lifetime! Some say, I am her mirror reflection and i would like to believe that too!!
But i prefer calling myself Her Shadow, forever trying to walk on the life imprints she leaves, that are forever etched in my psyche and can be seen in my persona as well!!
Yes SHE’s My Mother, i call her MOM ! And Yes! She’s MY UNSUNG HERO!
And She INSPIRES ! By Simply Being SHE!
Born in a reasonably affluent household to a Warrior, Visionary Father and a saintly Mother; She shared her childhood with four other siblings. Being the second Child, she was always the one who was given duties and responsibilities, which she was always keen to fulfill. She had a penchant for taking on all the hard-works; all the duties; all the responsibilities on her shoulders; her’s and of other’s; Selflessly and tirelessly, till date.
A Post Graduate in History, an able NCC Certified Cadet; She chose to be a Police Officer at a time when it was a rarity. She chose a life of discipline, duties and dedication. And Till date is respected for her honest and devoted service to her State. A Woman in the field dominated by gender – Bias and inequality which was even otherwise, very much prevalent in society at those times. IT was not an easy feat to earn the respect and make a mark when you are thought to be of a weaker gender and discriminated against.
She stood her fort and held her ground against all corrupt malpractices that have seeped in the force. She refused to be a part of any nexus and had to undergo a lot of troubled times in her career and life in general. But all this and more, never deterred her from her vision and morals.
Personal life too moved alongside and she became the wife of an Army Officer; life doesn’t surely seemed to be easy for her. Two people from completely different belt forces set out to create a life which was by all means, not an easy feat. Creating a World ensured every bit of sacrifice from both the life partners.
Many a decision making moments came when she literally, almost, gave up on her dreams of Being a strong, independent Woman in Uniform…, but something in her, and rightfully so, now i feel…. did not let her deter and let go off her aspirations and dreams!
Motherhood came and so, the balancing of both the worlds. She was everywhere, she was needed, never once complaining. Always overworked and busy but, always smiling and determined. I never saw her having a life apart from her family, work and responsibilities and often shouted at her for taking too much load. But i guess, this is the only way she knows how to live life…. She’s a Giver! Of comfort, love and what not and She takes your miseries, worries and responsibility. I must commend my father who supported her in living the life she chose! She’s a Survivor! She survived many things in life! She’s a Warrior! For she has braved many a storms in our lives whether, accidents, controversies, job hazards, deaths in the family and what not! SHE’s One Brave Woman!
But She raised us well! She’s one tigress that raised her cubs strong. We were treated like equals and we could talk anything and share everything under sun with both of our parents. She instilled her values and her morals well in us but let us be free to choose our beliefs.Me and my brother are not the kind of kids or youngsters who could speak out what we needed but while we would be asleep , she would keep a decent amount in our pockets without us ,having to ask ; this happens till date for everything,all our needs our catered to without ever a mention.In our household we were never criticised or forced opinions on ;we were only advised and the final decision would always be ours.But that doesn’t mean we were pampered or spoilt kids ,we had our own discipline to follow. Even in college or university ,a tender age for a girl ,she kept a watchful eye to safeguard me from any trouble but i always had liberty to choose my friends without any gender-bias and they were always welcome in my home. She had immense trust and faith in me;and i valued that and shared everything with her.
Our father being posted far away most of the times; our household and all family relations depended on her! She was the constant support system of even her parents!
She’s Honour and honesty incarnate! I have never met a person who has not praised her and reminded me that i’m lucky to be born out of her. A well read woman and with so many feathers in her cap, she’s an epitome of humility, humbleness and grace incarnate! But SHE SURE KNOWS WHERE TO VOICEOUT AND STANDS BY HER DECISIONS !!
She has loved endlessly and lives graciously. She has done so much for so many whether financially, morally or emotionally that she herself never remembers and upon asking, tells me that She has received this virtue as a legacy from her mother and She passes it on to me. I hope to live by it as honestly as i can .
Sometimes though I can’t understand her gregariousness!! Inspite of knowing everything, inspite of getting what others full of malice, or ill-will do, She chooses to ignore, to accept or, even be fooled by things and people. She sits like a mute spectator and allows shallow people to teach her ways of life. Upon fighting about this, She answers, that She chooses relations over Ego.!!
She’s happily enjoying a retired life of togetherness with my father and is like a typical Mom at home, praying and till date fulfilling the needs of her children and relations.But her zest for never waste any moment and to be forever in pursuit of learning makes her learn; learning new things and Adapting with the changing times; she reads a lot; she learnt driving fully and is a net savvy proud Mom who hobnobs on social media with the likes of her daughter and daughter in-law.
But one thing remains the same;she refuses to change her simplicity and has never yielded to fancy , fashionable world of make belief. She’s never bothered about her looks or what she wears and how people perceive her ,rather She speaks out straight from the heart ,without any frills and believes in her actions!
SHE STILL IS THE WIND BENEATH MY WINGS!! And fans and feeds all my new passions and dreams with the same enthusiasm as when i used to be in nursery!!
SHE IS AND WILL ALWAYS BE THE FIRST HAND OF SUPPORT TO ANYTHING I WISH TO PURSUE ANYTIME IN LIFE!
For She taught me to dream; To make my own decisions in life;To be in competition to only Self; That not every step forward is Success and that its okay to not be good in everything BUT BE GOOD IN LIFE!
I SMILE AND SURVIVE ALL THE BATTLES OF MY LIFE! Coz I HAVE HER !!
I’m Proud to be my Parents Child and grateful that every step of my life has been my Choice; That I have A VOICE, that get’s heard and that every step I have taken in my Life Has been my own….., AND I LOOK BACK AT LIFE, WITH ABSOLUTELY NO REGRETS AT ALL!!
That’s How WOMEN Shapes up life of others…. BY LIVING THEIRS OF THEIR OWN ACCORD!
So, these were a few of many Women that have touched my life in some ways or other. I hope to get a chance to introduce you to others sometime soon.
All i can say is How, Whom, When do we get to honour the women or men in our lives!! Is there a measure,?! We usually get to honour someone when he or she does something as massive or great that can be reckoned by the world.
I get it ! Its not possible to honour everyone on such a higher scale but i can atleast in my own small way, the best known to me, can atleast honor some Women up close and in personal life about whom the world may never know. This is my way of saying thankyou. THANKYOU FOR BEING YOURSELVES AND TOUCHING MY LIFE THE WAY YOU DID!
I wrote about four women each so distinct and different from the other. Each of them had a story; each were beset with decisions and choices, they rose up to or against. YET THEY ALL HAD SOMETHING IN COMMON…… A VOICE, A STRONG VOICE…. that sure knows where to make itself heard. A ZEST FOR LIFE! A LIFE TO BE LIVED IN HONOUR AND ON OWN TERMS! Each had choices she made, each one had her perspective of life on which she made decisions. We can’t judge the decisions or compare the decisions of one person from the other; we all have perceptions; we all dream; we are all beset with life changing decisions and we decide to the best of our capabilities.What is best for me, may not be for you. But we need to know that, know that well. And of all, atleast we women should not judge each other! For we don’t know what all it takes to be a woman you see. But We Must Remember, Every time we fall, We need to rise up from the ashes like a Phoenix and become a Warrior Queen , the Hero of our own Destiny!
Ending on a Happy Note of Wishing Each one of You “A Happy WOMANHOOD“!! Keep inspiring, be in love with who you Are!!
By the time you read this blog or this blog post reaches you, you would have already played with myriad of colours and enjoyed Holiwith your friends and family in full fervour or, must be dealing with the hilarious and tedious aftermath of the celebration!! As in, trying to rinse yourself off colours, marks, stains and what not and not to forget, the content tiredness and fuller tummies after the “H” Day!!!
It was an intentional decision! The decision to write the blog on the very day of Holi. You want to know why ?! Well, i wanted to bring to you all my thoughts and emotions and of-course, all the glimpses of my day, exactly the way this Holi brought to me. I have had a very ebb-tide; love-sulk kind of a relation with this festival. Holi & Me, we have seen our bad days; we have never hated each other but there have been few years in the past where we have not been best of the friends either! So, yes, i wanted to feel where do we stand in each other’s lives this day, and when we come face to face what would it be like!
So, here iam happily tired, bathed and washed, in my bed with a hot cuppa and writing! And yes, you got it right, hell yeah its a good news! Me and Holi are great friends this year and I intend to make it last this, for lifetime.
Indeed, Holi is the greatest festival celebrated all across our Bharat!And with what Love, what enthusiasm and eagerness! Children, youngster and elderlies all wait in all earnestness and prepare in advance for this special day. Whether food, music, decor, dance or laughter, Holi makes us unlock all our darkrooms and fills them with colours and enlightenment. We embrace our selves and others leaving all barriers and bitterness behind in true spirits of our traditions.
And why not!
If I rewind my life and look back, i feel that childhood years were the years when i used to be most keen, excited and happy to celebrate the festival of Holi. In fact, this must be the case in almost everyone’s life. We were naive, innocent, carefree and so spirited back then. The only motive at that time used to be to ‘make the most out of the moment‘; to quench the thirst for sheer fun, total happiness and tons of laughter. I fondly remember that how we used go around our colonies in groups with bucket full of balloons and colours in our “thaila’s” along with sweets and water to drink and whole day, all boys and girls, would gang up and play Holiand would sit under mulberry trees singing and dancing till our eyes literally would shut out of exhaustion and our parents came looking for us. Our holi celebrations would go on for days till atleast our colour and balloon supplies exhausted. Those were the days!
Never once, we felt conscious, vary or insecure of our surroundings or scared of the people around us.
But today i pondered and pondered as to What changed over the years?! Holi still comes every year and is celebrated with same gaitey all over the country and brings showers of colour and happiness in everyone’s life. People forget all hatred, ill-will, malice and forgive and forget and hug it all out!
Like me, many of my girlfriends too became reluctant and sulky over the years and started participating less in the festivity and each one of us every time when asked; had some or the other reason or excuse as to “i hate gulaal“; “im allergic to colours“; “i have sensitive skin or sun rashes” or what not!
Literally, there came a sort of phase in my life when my mind accepted for a fact that “I Hate playing Holi . Period”. But never until recently did i ask myself Why?
Well, actually this self introspection and hunting deep down my soul’s recesses is the result of so many episodes i keep listening to these days. Especially a week ahead of Holi, messages and initiatives like #buramanungiholihai #holikenaampebatmeezinhi #nomeansno ….and gross and shocking news of girls being attacked with semen filled balloons; molestation etc… stirred some cord inside and got me thinking and talking to many of my girl friends, children etc.
Today’s Woman sure knows to voice her heart out and why not its her prerogative, rather anything and everything that bothers our psyche, weighs down our heart, or threatens to take away our rights, should be
VOICED OUT AND HEARD.
Yes, why should on the name of celebrations or under pretext of a festival or anytime in general, we should be harassed, bullied, cajoled or made to feel discomforted. Whether through eyes; lewd remarks; or physical touch or persuasion or, even to tolerate an unfriendly or overfriendly company.
We grew upto a time when we girls even if we felt hurt or witnessed misappropriation or cheap behaviour, we avoided the situation or preferred to keep it all locked up inside us rather than voice it out, let alone stand against it.
Now that we have found our voice and have overcome our own inner dilemmas we reassess our decisions and inner mental blocks . Atleast i did!
Yes, many a times me and millions like me have witnessed, tolerated; or succumbed to ABUSE of any kind, ON THE NAME OF FESTIVITY, especially during Holi as is the nature of the festival that allows people to come near you,sometimes ,out of your comfort zone.
So, much so that i can vouch most of us women have faced abuse in one way or the other, at times like these and acts of groping, molestation attempt or even verbal attacks have left a scar in the minds of many. These unhappy, uncomfortable memories when don’t find a way of expression, they rather become a bitter boulder somewhere deep down inside; a colourless void or a sour wound.
And knowingly or unknowingly, we find reasons to blame, hide or shy away . I feel this is one of the major reasons that incidents like these subconsciously, lead to staying away from such a beautiful, colourful festival of life.
Few such bitter memories did leave some dark impact on my psyche too and rather unknowingly, i started excusing myself from this festival, Up until a few years ago…. hesitantly i made progress with baby steps towards this festivity and started to let go.
Let Go! Well, yes today on this festive day i sit down to write because I Marvel and I SUPPORT and I SALUTE The WOMEN WE HAVE COME TO BE! WE RECLAIM OUR VOICES AND WE STAND UNITED !
But even more so, I INVITE !
I invite mothers, sisters, daughters and friends! I invite you to let go! Let go all that’s locked inside; lift that boulder; open that window of your soul; revisit your scars; your demons and don’t you bury them….. find your way; any which way you choose and Let Go and Heal ! Heal and Celebrate ! Celebrate Holi ,Celebrate Life! Burn the demons in the pious agni altar of Holika dehan and purge yourself off the burden and set yourself free.
Its Time! The Time is Now! This World is a beautiful place and One life is all, we have to celebrate! We can’t wait for this place to be the safest heaven, nothing is nothing can ever be! But We Have The Power, The power to live life; The power to heal ! The power to create a safe and strong Mind, Body and Soul!
I Have allowed myself to heal over the years and i feel this Holi I Have Healed completely! No more dark demons!
I played to my heart’s content; i celebrated with my loved ones; i enjoyed the best possible way i knew; just the way i wanted to, in the comfort of relationships; danced; ate and made merry and of course, clicked tons of pictures and sealed new, happy memories in my life and forever!
Well, a note to the perverted few of the world! Don’t try to take undue advantage of our civility; cause NO CERTAINLY MEANS NO! You want to celebrate, well celebrate with ones willing to reciprocate;on the name of festivity you cannot claim proximities which are well beyond your limits! Don’t think we can’t show you doors!or chains or handcuffs, keep imagining!
And warm hug to the amazing men in my life! Thankyou for being the sunshines of my life, World sure seems a rainbow 🌈 full of promises of a colourful festive life!
Till Next Time ! Holi Hai !!! RangBarse!! Always in your lives!
ℹI’m back with another blog post. This time its a 💅 Fashion blog post and the topic under my scanner is “Military Fashion” ‼
Call it ‘Khaki’, ‘Olive’, ‘Camouflage’ or ‘Military’, Its one timeless trend that’s here to stay.!
ℹ have never been one to follow the dictats of fashion trends or to bind fashion into yearly ,seasonal changing themes or to follow the herd. I have always listened to what my heart and instincts wanted me to buy, design or create and to wear anything that my heart takes fancy to, at any given occasion in my life. Never have I felt conscious or uncomfortable to go in complete opposite to trending tastes of the season!
🔷However, Even I could not deny or ignore the influence and impact of “Military Fashion” on the Fashion scene ! Nationally and worldwide‼
⭕live Fashion has been in vogue as long as 1960’s or so. Whether its the camouflage prints, tough parkas, pea coats, trench coats, or the ceremonial dresses, dinner jackets swagger with brass buttons, pockets on chest and hips and stripes, leather trimmings plus embellishments and metallic buckles and tan belts; nautical wide legged trousers, The Cartier Tank Watches; The Welligton Boots; The neck scarves or Cravate; dungarees or plain powerful, summer cool, robust khaki’s; Militaria influence is unmistakable and everywhere around the globe; from raw, rugged street styles; thrift-stores to luxury fashion houses of paris; or runway’s of the world! Its presence cannot be ignored.
From celebrated designers worldwide like Yves Saint Lauren, Givenchy, Balmian etc and fashion scene closer home, everyone’s clothing line atleast once created something military-inspired and the process would be, and still is, cyclical.
🅾live fashion has invaded and carved a niche in the fashion world, It began influencing the fashion scene with hippie style cargo pants and army jackets and then came the parkas and over sized military coats, igniting a trend that added an air of power, intellect and sophistication‼
Not only clothing but even, accessories, like eye wear, watches, belts & bags and boots took to military inspiration. Who can forget TomFord’s Aviator Sunglasses, or super cool “Italian World War II Naval Submarine Watch “, a trademark “Belt Forces” fashion, almost a tradition followed till date❗
🅰lso, Louis Vuitton handbags and luggage cases have unmistakable military camouflage, army green or cargo inspiration.
Ⓜilitary fashion due to its earthy, palette of olive greens, grey’s, dark navy blue’s, burnished neutrals and khaki, beiges, browns and rugged, comfortable fabrics, clean cuts is a very utilitarian fashion, perfect for autumn classics but now rules almost every season. But thereal factor that highlights the military style is its practical side; more pockets, baagy style, rugged, comfy fabric, clean cuts and shapes for everyone, layering, neutral tones to match most silhouettes.
For quite some time this power packed trend remained in a very masculine zone and feminine side never much experimented with it. But from around 2008, we witness a massive wave and experimentation in this arena. Also, Militaria not only remained casual, streetstyle but entered the formal and classic fashion too, so much so that current scene is replete with military inspired fitness gears, gym clothing and athleisure wear lead by brands like Nike http://www.nike.com, Adidas http://www.adidas.com , Zivame http://www.zivame.cometc
〽any Unisex clothing articles and accessories saw their advent and apart from typical men’s cargo pants, camou jackets, trench coats, tan boots and metallic belts. Feminine fashion too saw comfort and power in military fashion and took fancy to it. As a result, we see a lot of khaki pants, shirts, tees, fitted dresses, backpacks, eyewear, boots, fishtail parkas, metallic chains, chokers and buttons, camou hoodies, shrugs, spahgetti tops, skirts, shorts and what not❗
🅰 woman adorning this trend believe it not, is sending a message across: of Power, of being comfortable in self and of being the sole authority on self but definitely a raw elegance and don’t mess with me attitude‼
ℹhave a comfy, cozy and special place for it in my life and my wardrobe. Its one trend I welcome with open arms! I truly and madly am in love with this one and its for here to stay.
ℹ truly believe what we choose to wear, what we pick up while shopping all transcends from what we feel about a certain style, fabric or hue, what aura a garment carries for us in our lives. Knowingly, and unknowingly we choose what we feel and behave.
🤷♀️Dressing up for me has always been a language; my clothes always convey my approach, my personality and my confidence in my life. Hence, fashion for me is the expression of my persona. May not be so for everyone, and I’m certainly not conveying that a person should be judged by his clothes; but neither can we deny that it does help us in creating an image.
Ⓜy love❤affair with “OG’z ” started way to early, as a school kid, at home watching my parents donning the Olive hues and camouflage uniforms (needless to say I’m a true Blue Fauji Brat).
Watching my Mom and Dad donning their uniforms, brought a kind of reverence to the pattern, shade and hue. It kind of attained a dignity and sense of 🅿ride and 🅿ower. How handsome and dignified they both looked!! I often dreamt of wearing “camous” and “OG” boots; and saving this world and mankind. It would almost give a 💪superhero vibe to me and I would wear my father’s boots and hold his stick and act like one😛.
☛Teenage years saw me experimenting with my parents’ discarded, outlived uniforms, trying to make something fashionable out of them. The military boots started fitting me and I often paired them with short dresses and skirts or denims. Especially, when the trend of ankle boots raged the fashion scene post movie “Rangeela” and the song “Yai re yai re” in which actress Urmila’s short dress and boots became the rave of those times. I saw lot many girls following the trend.
Grown up years saw a prominence in the military taste, watching my brother grow into this handsome, sophisticated, gentleman officer looking so dapper in his Olive greens, 🕶Aviators, 👞Wellington boots and ⌚Nautical watches brought so much awesomeness and fascination to me that my love of militaria became a serious affair.
🅰nd it so happened that I found love, with a persona who donned yet another hue of militaria. “This was destined to be”…. I seamlessly fell in love with earthy blues and pastel white tones of militaria, the dungarees, the white pintex, crisp ruffled shirts, ceremonial dinner jackets with brass buttons and stripes and the 👒bow-ties. And the love between me and the military fashion remains rock solid till date.
Hence, truly in my case my life’s reflections run true in the nuances of my clothing styles. I wear my pride and my life.
So, you see how important it was for me to write an ode to this gorgeous fashion that has my ❤ heart.
🅰nd all that I wrote above was to tell you how and perhaps, why I’m so taken in by this perennial fashion trend. But now I talk about what fun it is to style and wear this trend on different occasions.
✅So, here i go:
MY 🔫MILITARY WARDROBE UTOPIA/ ESSENTIALS :
Currently i own
1️⃣ Three miltary Jackets: One summer hue plain pastel olive and one camouflage hoodie open zipper. And one khaki shirt jacket with floral motif embroidery.
2️⃣ Two pairs of olive and grey joggers; One camou print and one nautical
3️⃣ One olive green long straight skirt
4️⃣ Olive badges and sticker tees
5️⃣ One earthy olive shade fitted evening dress
6️⃣ Athleisure jeggings in camou print and a six-pocket cargo pants
7⃣ One Puma sports bag and one camou printed Nuon 🎒 backpack and leather tan bag
8️⃣ Must have boots
9️⃣ Can’t live without Five pairs of aviators
🔟 One camou swatch and two nautical watches by Casio, G-shock (i love wearing men’s watches and perfumes, that’s my thing).
1️⃣1️⃣ One self designed embellished party jacket that i have designed with tons of brass buttons, golden stripes, shoulder badges and so on.
And the list is growing still and will do so forever, I feel.😛
😎STYLING MY MILITARY WARDROBE :
ℹ have heard many people saying that olive fashion doesn’t gel with other clothings and is difficult to match with and hence, boring or not multipurpose or diverse. But i have quite the opposite views, thoroughly enjoy styling the military clothing and love elevating the looks with accessories and mix-n-match too.
Here, i bring to you some military inspired street style, casual chic, sportyand casual evening drink looks. I have collaborated with my in house male models who share the same olive fetish as me @Tilak👤 Instagram Account , @Nik👤 Instagram Account to showcase some men’s military fashion too!
ℹ love going overboard with an all military look! I know for some people this might be little too much but trust me with right attitude, styling and accessories, this can be a very comfortable, statement, powerful and chic look to carry.
🔴We can wear co-ordinates aka matching top and bottom sets, like we are wearing in the shoot. We have styled olive green tees, sweat shirt or knitwear with matching tight bottomed comfy joggers.
To accentuate the look furtherwe can style the look with choicest of accessories and 👠footwear.
You can go with ankle 👢boots or sports shoes or slide on platforms of same or complete contrast colours.
Team it up with some tan leather 👜bag and a cool navy inspired ⌚Nautical watch
A camou or nautical print really goes well with an overall plain, solid olive coordinated outfit.
🅰dding metallic touch whether its some rugged, quirky pendants, chains, badges or choker or even sneakers will add just enough glamour to the look.
☑Styling olive bottoms with sheer tops, net sphagetti’s and layering it up with a jacket is yet another way to add the right amount of sexiness to the whole look and this look can be versatile whether its travel, evening out or to be donned when there’s a slight chill in the weather!
❇Cargo pants or “six pockets” as we commonly call them, the comfiest style statement, has been in vogue ever-since; it has been the first choice of travellers and trekkers all across the globe; a unisex garment that has utilitarian appeal, rugged and soothing at the same time. A statement in itself, Perfect to be worn with printed cotton tee’s and tan shoes and you are good to seize the world.
🔰Denims can gel perfectly well with anything military! A pair of jeans, shorts or skirt paired with an olive solid bomber jacket is stylish, smart and casual street chic; the styling can be taken up a notch higher with gothic lips, pigtail braiding (hairstyle) and wearing tons of metal chains and badgeson the waist and thighs. Sure shot stealer look that sets you apart❗
🅰nother perfect styling would be pairing the solid, summer 🆒khaki bomber jacket with a long straight khaki skirt; and just add a dash of colour with a ‘spaghetti top’ or a ‘ganji’ and Voila!! You are good to go for a shopping date with self. A comfortable yet effortlessly stylish.
Ⓜilitary fashion doesn’t only fit the streetstyle bills, it can be a powerful sexy weapon that unleashes the Goddess in you for some coffee evenings with friends and pub nights out as well. Style the military bodycon dress with some bright colour block layering and boots and a sexy sling and red lips.
WHO SAYS YOU CAN’T GO OLIVE ON VALENTINES!!.
Go Bold and all out Olive this Valentine as “OG Love is for real”!! You gals!!
MAKE YOUR MEN IN UNIFORM FEEL SPECIAL THIS VALENTINE!!
🅾live jackets paired with metallic shoes and shades and a net blush top, style with a top knot bun, a perfect recipe for a day on a ⛵boat out to sail or anyother adventurous activity. Keeping the fun and style quotient balanced.
🅰nother amazing way of pulling off the Olive look with elan is teaming up two different shades of Military together. Going olive with green or khakee with grey or beige and tan; navy blues and rugged greys!! These can be mixing and matching two different garments together or colour blocking with accessories.
🔰So friends With this style, i conclude my blog post, this blog post saw me exhibiting various militaria inspired garments, styled with different fashionable and comfy clothes and accessories to achieve the desired looks to suit the occasions. I feel Olive trend is one of the most versatile, easy to style; most comfortable and suitable to one and all kind of styles. It has a versatility and likeability to it; it can at once be converted to a high-end fashionlook and an everyday casual, sporty look to a powerful, awestruck one. Its here to stay and can be played upon with with our sensibilities .
👉 In this blog post, i exhibited my love for styling militaria in everyday, casual yet statement looks; another blog post would be soon curated to showcase a more embellished, decorated and dramatic avatar of this fashion trend!! Till then Hail Militaria!! Go OliVe ! Go Green!!
💃I’ll be back soon with more interesting stuff! Till then stay stylish, be fashionable, imbibe conscious beauty, keep experimenting but most of All BE THE MAGICAL SELF YOU ARE!!
Its been a really long time that i blogged about heart renderings and mind ramblings. So, in order to cleanse my mind and pour my heart, here’s a post that will be a much needed catharsis for myself and hopefully, a good read for you.
There are days when you wake up to a smiling, happy, busy day ahead and there are days when there is a coldness in the air, like a foreboding silence lurking; yet there will be days you wake up with time in your hand to sit back and stare at the sun, some good music playing and lot of time to introspect.
No two days are similar; SAME GOES WITH OUR LIFE , we go through phases in our life, different all, of those different from each other. And what do we do, we always try to beat ourselves in trying to bring all phases of our lives to the best one we had.
I often sit back and think about how people and relations around me think and work. I always find most of my girl pals especially, giving their own selves a very hard time constantly muling over how they looked in past and how they are not their best self now.
Reminiscising the past and the whole nostalgia vibe does give you a proud,mushy ,warm feeling ,and we often like to seek comfort and revel in how we looked in the past . While some of us draw inspiration from our own looks,fitness levels,youthful, glowing skin in the past and try to maintain ourselves,some of us beat ourselves and make it a reason of our unhappiness,stress,lack of confidence and depression.
Many a times we compete with people and trends around and put ourselves under much strain.And if any space in self bashing is left, much chagrin is added by our so called friends,acquaintances and relations.
YES, isn’t it true? Don’t we all know someone or the other who sometimes very gently ,sometimes sarcastically and yet another times to generate much humour slide in remarks about our age, height, weight, boniness,shape, bachelorhood, motherhood,nerdy looks and what not etc that often render us speechless or tongue -tied ;and sometimes with a twitch in our heart and ;sometimes deeply wounded BUT AT ALL TIMES SELF-CONSCIOUS!
I have often seen people around me, many a times,completely ignoring to acknowledge the commendable work done or achievements but would make it a point to specially take time out to reach out and point out any signs of weakness, faltering or failures if any. .This often raises a question.WOULD WE EVER BE ENOUGH!! Someone amongst us would always be too skinny or weak and plastic; someone too fair or made -up , someone too dark ;too short- heighted or tall; too fat hence,a glutton or a slag ;slut shamed to be single or flirty or even a gold- digger and so on.
I am suddenly reminded of one such instance when once grocery shopping in the market i happened to come across a long lost friend,upon looking at her i literally ran towards her with sheer joy to give her a bear hug but was rather welcomed by quite a judgey remark about how i looked and was admonished at not fulfilling my duty of planning motherhood and still enjoying life like a newly wed!!! ……. For few seconds i was dumbstruck and caught in a tight corner. A very small incident and a casual matter if you see,but had this occured some time before it would have probably caused me much pain,anger and the feel to retaliate, ending up wounded ,sulking or withdrawn.BUT NOT ANYMORE .
I laughed it out and turned the conversation to a whole new side as it didn’t really matter .IT DOES NOT MATTER WHAT OTHERS THINK OF YOU,YOUR LOOKS ,YOUR LIFE CHOICES ,YOUR DECISIONS!! AS ITS YOUR JOURNEY AND NOT ANY ONE ELSE’S.
We must remember that we evolve each passing moment of our life sometimes for the good,and ahead a few steps than before and yet some days we see ourselves relegating backwards, not progressing rather , regressing.
ITS OK TO BE NOT OK or, in your best frame always,Its OK to be pushed back a few steps.ITS LIFE NOT A RACE.
There are gazillion of us mere mortals in this world ,each one has descended on this Earth with one life,one purpose, a greater reason to be on this place.Each one of us born with our own perspective and ideologies in this society .Can we make each one happy??Can we fit into every mold or frame construed by this society?? Do we need to??
NO! WE DON’T . WE CAN’T! There comes a point in life where each one needs to ask ourselves these questions. We are not born to a lifetime of trying to fit into definitions conceived by others for us. We need to break the definitions. Anything and everything that starts burdening our existence and our soul doesn’t want to bend to,needs to be stood against.ALL TABOOS AND STEREOTYPES made by others need to be vanquished.
And to do that my fellow friends we need to embrace,caress,love and protect our own real self first.We must see the good in us at all times; We must count on and trust our instincts at all times; if we only won’t ,then who else will?!
Admire our own idiosyncracies, our oddness ,our little crazy selves ; our own flaws ( if at all we want to call them that),WELL, THAT’s what makes us our own special selves.
We need to understand what makes us truly happy,what kindles our soul and ignites our mind.And that my dearies would be our true calling.We can’t force ourselves to do what our peers are doing ,if that doesn’t interest` us; we can’t dress up or behave like our siblings because that put-up act or facade won’t last for long and would be a sham.Its sometimes really scary to be different or not fit in, but definitely worth your life and your comfort.YOU CAN’T BE SOMEONE YOU ARE NOT,FOR LONG.
We can’t allow anyone and everyone to affect us in any way that shakes our faith and love in our own real self. Not fitting into the stereotypes of how one should be, or how one’s suppose to lead one’s life be it, in terms of BEAUTY,FASHION,BODY TYPE,LOOKS, STATUS,CAREER,MARRIAGE OR MOTHERHOOD. We can’t allow judgements to affect us to a point that hamper or alter our course of chosen life.
FALL IN LOVE WITH YOURSELF; WIPE YOUR OWN TEARS;LAUGH AT YOUR OWN SILLINESS; BE YOUR OWN COMPLETE!!!!
The above mentioned line,once upon a time struck a cord within me and has stuck with my soul ever since.I HOPE IT REACHES OUT TO YOU THE SAME WAY AND HEALS WOUNDS IF ANY,UNTIES KNOTS IF ANY ,RENDERS YOU FREE OF SHACKLES IF ANY….AND INSPIRES YOU ANYHOW.
We must feel free to dream; free to fly.Also,learn to let go of our dreams.Be anything and nothing at all!!
Wear what you please, travel;dress up; be raunchy or geeky; foodie or a fitness freak; speak up ,be brash or quiet or moody; fall in love with the same person again and again or fall in love with different;read or not; gaze at stars or be a hopeless romantic Flaunt your curves and take pride in your bony structure. Be raw, be polished; BE YOU. Choose to be you.You are a work of art in itself. You live,therefore,you Exist.
JUST LIBERATE ,liberate yourself from the vulnerability of getting hurt and conscious of the judgements and harsh criticisms.The day you will realize it no more matters what they think of or,expect out of you.The day you don’t feel the need to be defined anymore.
On a personal front i feel that i have as a person finally come of age now..I have come to love and respect who i am and who i have come to be.I am more accepting of myself than ever before; more comfortable in my own skin.No more do i feel the need to validate my actions ,no more do i care of opinions about me .In the ever changing myriad of Life;LOVE STRUCK, A DEVOTIONAL ,ENLIGHTENING,LIBERATING KIND OF LOVE ,I FOUND MY CONSTANT IN MY SELF. I consciously choose to eliminate toxicity in any form or manner from my life.As we progress in age,life and maturity ,we no more feel the need to be surrounded by a huge group of peers or be a part of happening crowds as comfort,reality and loyalty preceeds validation and you find yourself with less but valuable companionships that know you inside out and are all accepting of you and love you just the incredible special way you are.SUCH RELATIONS ARE FOR KEEPS.
While i talk about how if we embrace ourselves the way we are and shower some SELF-LOVE on to our special being, none of this matters,YET A WORD OR TWO TO OUR VERY CONCERNED ,CARING WELL WISHERS… with my hands folded,thank you so much for your love and concern but there is always a better and more polite way of trespassing someone’s personal space. And if at all you may, or are genuinely concerned.PLEASE keep in mind your one question,judgement,taunt or tease can cost someone dearly their life,their confidence or self -esteem,as you can’t even begin to imagine or fathom how they have reached to the point where they are.A moment of your casual remarks can stay in someone’s psyche and scar them for life.
I CHOOSE TO BASK IN GLORY OF MYSELF,EACH DAY , EACH MINUTE.
I CHOOSE TO BE MY OWN ,BEFORE I AM OF THIS WORLD OR ANYONE ELSE’S.
On this note ,i intend to rest my pen and my thoughts.This piece is a heart pour as much cathartic for self as it is written for my darling readers to connect and send positive vibes to.I hope anyone and everyone if at all ,going through any lows in life.LETS BE EACH OTHER’S GUIDING LIGHT. AND HEY, REMEMBER TO BE YOUR OWN COMPLETE COZ ,THEY DON’T MATTER.
UNTIL NEXT TIME CHAO !! STAY POSITIVE! REVEL IN SELF LOVE!
BUT MOST OF ALL BE THANKFUL FOR A HUMAN LIFE AND BE HUMANE TO OTHERS!!
Its a well known saying that “You are never completely dressed till the time you wear your FRAGRANCE”.
I Do Believe truly that’ Your Fragrance should linger on long enough even after you are gone.’ Our fragrance, like every thing else on the outside , is also a reflection of who we are as a person. Its like a scented message of your persona, a liquid emotion, more so, like your signature style.
A Fragrance is the first thing that reaches out and spreads your aura after of course, 👄Smile. It transcends the other, to a dream like happy state, its like a metaphor for communicating emotions, that can be felt.
Well Cmon, its a fact that who doesn’t love to communicate with a person who smells nice!! And we do become the cringy-nosed people when we spot Body Odour!! Yikes!
So Folks! It was pertinent for me to bring some product for my beloved readers in this regard. I mean how could i not! A good and genuine fragrance is the utmost essential weapon in the most well-dressed Woman’s armory. 😉Wink! 😉Wink! AND Definitely YOU 👨🎨Men out there its equally important for you as well as we 💁women prefer to be in the company of Gentlemen who smell nice Ahem!Ahem!😜
Its very important that a fragrance matches our senses, our spirit and our persona to call it our very own. Hence, we can’t depend on gas-filled deodorants, sprays etc to call it our personal fragrance. For that we need a unique, trusted and long staying PERFUME.
SO, After much search and thought i bring to you on my Blog A Perfume Brand named ‘PERFUME BOOTH’ a new, yet a trusted and very renowned brand in our Indian market. They have curated a wide range of international fragrances both for Men and Women, in the form of perfumes and that too at an unimaginable price range.
I See a lot of us opting out and depending totally on deodorant and sprays for our day today fragrance needs and i feel the major reason so is their affordability. BUT deo’s, sprays don’t have the longevity and aren’t in the purest forms and often darken the skin and are harsh.
PERFUME BOOTH, as a brand has understood this fact that perfumes are associated with an ‘expensive’ purchase.Hence,they have managed to eliminate the various steps in marketing and distributing a perfume and have brought premium quality fragrances from all over the world directly to the customers.
This brand offers about more than 40 products to choose from for both the genders. Their product range is divided mainly in two packaging categories:
PERFUME SELFIE some of the names of products are, lurve; sophistique; teaze; cazanova etc
100 ml Perfume Bottles namely, Creation Noir; Presidente; Classic Man; Active Woman; True Reflections etc.
The product that i have been sent for Review is a PERFUME SELFIE package box named LURVE.
Its a pack of Women Perfume comprising of 7 International perfume sticks, a Perfume Selfie Case and along with it a Gift Voucher of Rs 501.!!!😍
👉SO, Here’s my review of this Perfume Selfie BOX.
I found this Perfume Selfie Box concept to be a unique and one of its kind concept. In this box you get to try out 7️⃣different mini fragrances from 7️⃣different brands and later we can always pick up a bottle of your choice.
✅PACKAGING : This Perfume Selfie box LURVEhas a very impressive and luring packaging. Its a cylindrical shaped box covered with a very attractive and tantalizing colour paper sheet in red and the product name name hologrammed on it. On the inside, it has a thermo case in which all the 7 black coloured perfume sticks and the red selfie case beautifully stands in a small circle. Along with it, a rounded series of placards, describing names of all the 7 perfume sticks and a gift voucher card is also inside the box.
Packaging is a very formative step in introducing a product to the consumer market and how impact fully its done speaks volumes about the dedication, sincerity and ambition of the brand and also, winning the hearts of its customers. I LOVED their packaging game on point.
✅QUANTITY : Each of the 7 perfume selfie sticks contains 4ml of product i:e, 7×4 ml =28ml of product. Hence, we get a good deal of product in just one box, that too of 7 different varieties to suit our mood and occasion. The product can easily last up to two months approximately.
✅PRICE RANGE: The perfume selfie box containing 7 international perfumes sticks of 4ml each,comes at a price of Rs 475/- only . Considering the wide variety, good quality and long lasting products, it surely is value for money, worth every penny and high affordability factor, a big thumbs up!!
✅PAY-OFF: The brand claims the sprays to be six times longer lasting than deodrants, having a high quality perfume oil concentration. Personally, i felt it lasted more than six hours on me.
✅TRAVEL WISE: The perfume selfie case and sticks are made of light weight, plastic unbreakable mini bottles with lock lids, so are highly travel friendly and can be carried anywhere, anytime without any damage or wastage. We can easliy pick the perfume stick for the day, put it inside the selfie stick and are good to go for the day.
✅QUALITY: All the perfumes availed to us in this box are from 7 different renowned international brands of high quality and amazing, long lasting fragrance.
✅FRAGRANCE: The LURVE Box sent to me had 7 amazingly unique and pleasing fragrances that completely suited the persona and style of a woman like me. You will find everything that suits your taste or style whether its, floral, woody, citrus, fruity, musky etc.
They write about the LURVE WOMEN, “She’s all things classic. You’d picture her walking down the Parisian streets, holding a dozen carnations. She personifies’lurve’. She’s special and you know that.”
AND yes, the fragrances match the description perfectly and hence, suited me so well, that i fell in love with each one of them.
The name of the fragrances in this box are as follows:
1️⃣CHIFFON EMPER; 2️⃣TRUE REFLECTIONS CHRIS ADAMS PARIS ; 3️⃣CREATION POUR FEMME; 4️⃣VIVECA MARYAJ; 5️⃣GOLD LOUIS CARDIN; 6️⃣LADY PRESIDENTE EMPER; 7️⃣SENSUAL LOMANI PARIS.
While each of the fragrance was beautiful and soothing my top favourites are 👌🏿SENSUAL BY LOMANI, my everyday perfume and 👍CHIFFON BY EMPER for evenings and 👏LADY PRESIDENTE for my work wear.
ALL, in all, i’m highly impressed and bowled over by this brand, its concept and product range.Specially,their initiative of bringing ‘affordability’ to the otherwise elite and occasionally used perfume.Their high quality perfumes are much better than cheap deodrants, have longevity and can now be easily incorporated into daily usage by one and all. Also, their ‘Patent Perfume Case’ is a unique and stylish concept and can be easily carried anywhere in style and used all day long.
HENCE, I’m highly recommending this brand to my readers, not only for their personal use but also for gifting purposes. NOT to forget the gift voucher of Rs.501/- that can be redeemed while purchasing an 100ml bottle perfume out of 42 more stylish and encapsulating products. Its a great deal.
Try these ones out and keep yourself and your lives beaming, fragrant and happy !!!
DO CHECK OUT THEIR INSTAGRAM PAGE AND THEIR WEBSITE, THE LINKS OF WHICH ARE GIVEN BELOW:
I’m finally back on the block after a long haitus!
This Blog post is a long pending one and deserves a high mention because the products at hand have really won me over and i have reaped some real benefits. That clearly means that if I have benefitted from something, I have to in most likelihood, share it with you my darling friends.
So, my dearies I’m right here to talk about two magical oils from the renowned, indigenous brand named SATTHWA, a natural hair and care product range and a wide variety of organic, all natural essential oils.
The two oils I have religiously used for almost two months and am going to review are:-
1. SATTHWA PREMIUM HAIR OIL
2. SATTHWA JOJOBA CARRIER OIL
Before I begin the review I must share my curiosity and reason to try this product. I have been blessed with thick luscious curly locks, infact, I used to get irritated having to maintain such heavy hair. Gradually, however I noticed considerable hairfall and I owed it to low maintenance, styling, colouring and sweaty workout routines.
Off-late, I saw a massive increase in hairfall not only from roots rather a lot of hair breakage as well, that clearly signified that my healthy hair were slowly loosing their strength and nutrition as well and were getting dry and damaged. I got into a panic mode and tried and tested several influential so called organic, chemical free products that promised relief from this grave issue and save my crowning glory. Alas, none came to my rescue and my search continued.
Also, its pertinent to mention that the problem of hair-fall, hair damage is so rampant that my inboxes are flooded with requests for reviewing products that could stop hairfall and improve hair health. I receive such requests on a day-to-day basis. Hence, my search for the perfect remedial product became all the more crucial.
Apart from this issue another query that I’m often bombarded with is the effect of face serums and oil, a trend that is ruling the roost these days and if they are really effective, on what skin types will it suit and in what ways and how to pick the right product from an array of so many. So, this was another reason I was looking for a trusted aide and tried a number of products.
Finally, I came across the instagram handle of this brand SATTHWA and then checked out their site. I had a word with the founder and told him that I would like to review their products for the above mentioned issues and they were gracious enough to send these two oils to me for reviewal.
Before reviewing, let me write something about the brand first. It is a 100% natural and organic certified Hair and Skincare brand. It was started by the visionary founder Mr.Prashant Parikh in 2016 and ever since, its hair oil and many new products like essential oils have benefitted many and there has been no looking back. They, at SATTHWA, go by the motto of “PURE TO THE CORE”, hence, the brand name Satthwa means “PURE” in Sanskrit.
So, here is my review for the two…….
(A) SATTHWA PREMIUM HAIR OIL
This is the most sought after product from the brand and has been creating ripples. Its a premium Hair Oil, 100% chemical free, made with goodness of 9 oils namely, Olive oil, Castor oil, VitaminE, Almond oil, Grapeseed oil, Coconut oil, Jojoba oil, Amla oil, Emu oil. The power of these 9 oils makes this oil a powerhouse, regulates blood flow to scalp, darkens hair, making them thick, stops split ends, promotes new hair growth, prevents greying, unclogs pores, provides anti fungal support, restores ph balance, provides antioxidants and keratin strength reducing frizz and dryness.
Hence, it becomes the super food for our hair and scalp, replete with all the essential vitamins Vitamin K, E , Iron, Calcium, Magnesium, Omega-6 & 9, Ricinoleic acid, Lauric acid. It not only controls hair fall but also promotes hair growth and fights premature greyingand absolutely clears dandruff.
Thousands of people suffering from these issues have benefitted and some special cases of bald patches, hair thinning have also seen hair growth success and positive results.
Now lets come to the nutshell reviews and final verdict.
1. PACKAGING. This oil comes in simple packaging of a convenient plastic bottle with a rotate lid of 100 ml capacity.It has a white paper cover on the outside that carries a detailed information about the product and its ingredients and its essential goodness along with the brand logo and the Made in India and paraben free tag highlighted.It also has directions of use written for best results.
2. M.R.P. 100 ml of the product comes at a M.R.P OF Rs 599/ which i feel is quite a catch for the invaluable service of the product.This aspect is definitely a thumbs up from my side.A genuinely, affordably priced product.
3. Fragrance.it doesnot have any particular or strong odour,smell or fragrance.
4. MFG. It comes with a shelf life of one year.
5. HAIR TYPE. Best for all hair types, especially, dry frizzy hair.
PROS – It is completely natural, 100% chemical free and a no-side effects product. It is highly travel friendly and easy to use. Starts delivering results within few uses. It Delivers what it claims.
CONS – No cons as such but maybe the packaging could be made more attractive for such an amazing product. Also, a packaging with a bigger bottle and more product as the usage is high and refills are frantically needed.
FINAL VERDICT – I have been personally using this oil for more than two months now and I have seen a tremendous change in my hair. My hair fall has considerably reduced, my hair are so soft, gentle and minus the frizz in spite of styling and coloring I have also used thids oil in many DIY hair masks, I will soon be sharing them on my YouTube Channel. My curls are soft, balanced, nourished, healthy, shiny and strong. I highly recommend this product for all your hair woes and hair care routines. I am going to consistently and religiously use this product to keep on reaping benefits.
(B) SATTHWA JOJOBA CARRIER OIL
This is the second product sent to me for reviewing by the brand upon my query and search for some good facial oils, the founder sent me the sample of Satthwa 100% JOJOBA (pronounced ho-ho-ba ), oil. Its an unrefined, cold pressed moisturizing carrier oil derived from a wild plant shrub. It has some tremendous giving and magical properties. It is highly hydrating and moisturizing for the body as well as hair. Its been known to be used for healing hair,skin and sunburn conditions. Its also known for its anti-ageing properties and its regular application provides soft, supple, nourished and a glowing skin that is forever, youthful and happy. It is rich in Vitamin E and reduces the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles.
It fights even the most stubborn Dandruff when mixed with few drops of lemon grass essential oil for best results.
Not only this, it also acts as a fabulous makeup remover, specially helpful in removing heavy makeup such as highly pigmented lip colours and eyeshadow, mascara etc.
Even while removing makeup it continues to protect our exposed skin naturally, keeping it soft and safe from harsh rubbing, removing, cleansing process and makes the entire process quicker and easier and keeping the skin nourished.
Its an excellent nourisher for NAILS, for moisturising cuticles,it boosts healthy nail growth and reduces nail breakage.
It acts as an excellent hydrating,moisturising massage oil for the body, rendering it no-residual oil on skin and giving it a healthy glow.
Jojoba Oil is extremely beneficial for Hair and prevents and stops hairfall as it acts as an antifungal and unclogging agent of hair follicles and scalp pores.
Nutshell, Review and Final Verdict
1. PACKAGING. This oil too comes in a small, convenient,plastic bottle with a rotate lock white lid.Its a 50 ml bottle.It is easy to carry ,leak-proof ,travel friendly bottle.It has a transparent sticker wrapped around it upon which all the details of the product is written.
2. M.R.P. A 50ml product comes for the price of Rs 499/- .Now, it comes on a special introductory price of Rs.380/-.Its worth its price quoted.
3. FRAGRANCE. No specific,pungent or strong fragrance.SO,Safe for people who have odour allergies.
4. M.F.G It comes with a shelf life of one year.
5. SKIN TYPE. BEST FOR DRY SKIN OR NORMAL BUT GOOD FOR ALL SKIN TYPES.
6. PROS and CONS. This oil is one of a kind, very light and gets easily absorbed in the skin, gives an amazing healthy glow and nourishment to skin and hair.It acts as an amazing part of the base makeup ,apart from other benefits mentioned above, it renders the makeup dewy,fresh and glossy.it is equivalent to any elixir glow face oils in the market. Its again a chemical free 100% pure,natural oil with no side-effects
CONS. No cons in particular, again if only, a bigger packaging would be recommended for this amazing product as the usage is more and on regular basis.
FINAL VERDICT – I have been using this oil for quite awhile now and it has become a necessity and a bare essential in my day today skincare routine. I use this oil in many of my routines.
Firstly, I use this oil in my makeup removing routine whenever i apply makeup.
Secondly, i use it as an important part of double- cleanse process,inspired by korean cleansing routines, twice a week.
Thirdly , I use it as a part of my base makeup application,thatis,i mix 2-3 drops of Jojoba oil with my Foundation,BB Cream or even a Tinted -Moisturiser, to achieve that sheen,glossy,dewy a natural,flawless makeup .
Lastly, I use this oil as a massage oilfor my body and even in place of night-cream.I also,use it in making many face and hair DIY home remedies and packs to derive maximum benefits.
Thus, its a thumbs up and highly recommended product from my side ,worth its price and you must give it a try,even if you have an oil-skin type.
Today I bring to you from my colourful world of 💄lipsticks, a few chosen ones to be reviewed.
👉Lakme India had launched its lip crayon some time back. However, initially I was not very inclined and when there was some buzz around it, I somehow never got a chance to grab those in my kitty until recently. I purchased them on a combo offer online which seemed like a good deal at the time.
Well, the lust for lippies is a never ending saga for most women like me! I hope you agree with me, if not then what cosmetic art you lust after the most? Do let me know for sure.
SO, I got down to usage of my 💋lip crayon collection and now I feel ready with my honest reviews and of course the much needed swatches, which while shopping online can be quite a dissuading thing as,same happened with me.
WELL, for review I have four shades in all out of 10 shades of pinks, peaches, reds and browns launched of LAKME ENRICHED LIP CRAYONS.
1. Shade-01 Berry Red
A FIERY SIREN DEEP RED PERFECT FOR THAT NIGHT PARTY OR THAT BLACK DRESS, OR EVEN FOR A CORPORATE FORMAL DINNER, A TYPICAL CLASSY BADASS COLOUR. WILL SUIT ALL SKIN TONES.
2. Shade-02 Red Stop
THIS IS A VERY DIFFERENT KIND OF RED. A LIGHT RED SHADE.CAN BE GOOD FOR A DAY OR NIGHT WEAR. WILL SUIT FAIR SKIN TONES BETTER.
3. Shade-03 Candid Coral
THIS SHADE IS A PEACHY ONE THAT ALMOST DOUBLES UPTO BE A VERY PRETTY SOBER ORANGE, PERFECT FOR THE DAY WEAR OR IF YOU WANNA HIGHLIGHT THE NEON TREND, CAN BE A GOOD ONE TO MIX SHADES AS WELL. ITS VERY CLOSE TO THE SHADE 02 RED STOPWILL SUIT WHEATISH SKIN TONES BEST
4. Shade-06 Pink Burst
THIS IS A SHOW STEALER AMONGST THE LOT. MY MOST FAVOURITE. I BOUGHT IT SEPARATELY FROM A DRUGSTORE BUT I’M THE HAPPIEST WITH THIS ONE. YOU CAN ASK WHAT’S SPECIAL ITS ANOTHER PINK. BUT I’LL ANSWER ITS THE PERFECT PINK WITH SHIMMER AND SHINE IN IT, IT GIVES A METALLIC EDGE TOO AND HAS THE MAUVE AND MAJENTA COMBO TONES. IT AT ONCE LIGHTENS UP THE LOOK AND BRIGHTENS UP ANY ATTIRE. YOU ARE SURE TO GET COMPLIMENTS.WILL SUIT ALL SKIN TONES.
Well to begin with
PACKING: These come in cute, playful sketching crayon packing that reminds us of drawing books and crayon coloured childhood.Very comfortable crayon pencils with black caps that come with a sharpener each.
TEXTURE: These crayons have a creamy, smooth gliding texture however, they do tend to crease up and show fine lines on the lips.
PAYOFF: It takes about 1-2 application to get the complete colour.
PIGMENTATION: The crayons are richly pigmented.
FRAGRANCE: They have a very mild gummy fragrance to them, a pleasant one.
PERFORMANCE: These crayon lippies stay at max upto 3 hours our so and then start bleeding and also, these colours do smudge and transfer easily.
BUDGET: Each crayon(with a sharpener) is of the MRP. Rs185/-. A Very budget friendly product and the quantity too worth its price.
REMOVAL: It comes off very easily, though can get messy while removing.Its highly recommended to remove it with a makeup remover or a face oil or oil cleanser.
I would recommend this product considering its value for money. Its not a great product but not a bad one either.
Its a must buy for people like me who do not use the product too much and end up getting bored or wasting the product to its expiry. These little crayons are a good deal. Also, I would highly recommend these to all the students and people who like to invest in affordable but trusted makeup. These one’s are sure deals for you.
🌻HOWEVER, a bit of caution choose wisely, as when buying online the swatches can get quite confusing, specially in the case of these crayons as the peaches to reds have a very similar colour tone and shade and are almost nearby in the shade range. The combo offer that I received had a trio of relatable colour shades as you can see above.
TIP: However,a little blogger advice.Donot forget to apply hydrating lip balms before applying these or any other lip colours.Also,do exfoliate your lips off and on with sugar granules at home OR a good lip scrub.
For the young 💁girlies out there, advice from personal learning. DO Stay away from cosmetics as long as you can as you are naturally endowed with everything beautiful at this growing stage of your life and if at all you do wanna go ahead… do so by all means but then make sure you do follow it up with a skincare routine either with mama’s home remedies or with only natural, organic and chemical free products so that you, your skin, beauty, heart and mind remain ever so happy and healthy till ages to come.
SO, LADIES I sure hope my reviews would be of some help for you or atleast a good read.
Would see you soon with more such stuff from the archives of my mental box.
TilL then Stay safe, stay 💪healthy and beautiful inside out💅.
MUCH ❤️LOVE CHAO XOXO! VASHI / THAT PASHMINA GIRL.💁
A CRUNCHY, CRISPY, CHATPATA 💁HOLA !! TO ALL MY READERS❗️
Well, you must have guessed by now why I’m sounding so desperately 👅hungry, that too for little tit-bit munching on the side.
Well, That’s because I have discovered my munching friend recently!!!
and that’s none other than SNACKEXPERTS!!
Are you one of those people who loves munching, has a taste for the chatpata, crunchy small eats; who loves to eat yummy snacks; one who cannot have evening tea without any snacks or feel the need of munchies while reading, watching movies, travelling or gossiping with friends????/??
BUT BUT BUT❗️ You have given up on snacking; you are starving your tastebuds; or you are ridden with constant guilt everytime you tend to snack on that pack of mixture; that pack of wafers; those maida cookies; that sugar rush candy box or that chocolate cake❗️
WELL❗️ Lets accept it guys nothing comes before health and anything and everything that we buy from the market in packets and boxes these days is full of adulterated, unhealthy health hazardous, refined goodies that tempts us all but brings lot of health issues and addictive eating habits as well.
Nostalgia writs large❗️
There was a time when every household in our country would smell of some freshly made home goodies at tea time in the evening; as tea time is almost a sacred every day ritual in our country and inviting guests at tea time especially is a culture in itself. Mothers and ladies of the house would extensively prepare homemade healthy and fresh goodies; sometimes to be stored in jars for few days and sometimes freshly made and served. Only a little portion would be served everyday and some kept safely for guests as well! Those were the days!! We could polish off an entire platter and never worry even a little for any ailment, fitness issues or ill-health.
TODAY, as we reach around mids of 2017, a look back makes us realise the paradigm shift of the shape shifting world. We are always running; running to meet the deadlines; reach offices; schools and what not. TIME today has become the most hard to get commodity. It really gets tough for such elaborate rituals and a quick ready to eat bite or packaged snacks; on the go kind of thing seems most befitting. I’m not saying that today our households don’t indulge in home-cooked fresh and health goodies; we do and kudos to all the men-women and families for that! Its only, that the frequency has lessened and so has the preference.
Not to talk of the alluring, well-marketed unhealthy, yet tempting and easy options that our flooding the market today. Not only these are addictive and fast becoming our lifestyle, its trending as well! Almost like a fashion fad, status quo! Especially the children are falling prey to this trend. Also, as most of us are always conscious these days of what to eat and what not to; often when sudden guest plans catches us in tight corner with no time to stir up some fresh goodies and we have to get something packed or from the market; often our guests decline the served goodies and we become the reason of our own embarrassment.
Well❗️ there’s another side to our story as well. We are aware of the health hazards and most of us are trying our best to look for healthier options.BUT again, the same issue of market being flooded with so many options. While there are products whose label read healthy, organic, natural and so on; often found misleading, adulterated, greasy, refined, unhealthy and finally when we actually find trustworthy organic products; their whopping prices touch the roof.
Well❗️ enough of my rants and ravings! AND back to being the crunchy munch HOLA GIRL!
For now the time has come to introduce the newfound guilt-free joy my tastebuds have fallen for!Its a great snacking option and good on the pockets too.
The brand named SNACK EXPERTS, is the candy to my tongue these days.I got a chance to review their snack pack and was apprehensive at first but was amazed and highly impressed when I tried them.
SO, HERE BEGINS MY HONEST REVIEW OF THE SAME:
SnackExperts is an award winning online snack store that delivers nationwide; their base store is in Chennai. I received their products in a cute and sturdy recyclable cardboard package, that had their logo and tagline printed on top,…. saying……
“HEALHTY SNACKING UNLEASHED”
And on the back side of the package instruction the ways this pack can be reused are written. This I found quite cute and useful. For me, how much a brand makes efforts in packing their products speaks volumes about their sincerity towards their venture.
Upon unboxing I found five zip-locked, neatly packed assorted varieties of healthy munchies inside.
Each of the snack pouches looked tempting,fresh and mouth watering but best of all — they were healthy, less oily and wholesome.You can munch on these goodies without having to worry about any ill-health produce. They remained fresh for as long as their expiry date in their pouches.
Each snack packet has a name synonymous to the ingredients inside;
The five packs out of their 50+ snack varieties that I received were:
1. DRY FRUIT MIX
This snack pouch was a sweet tangy fruity delight. It tasted freshness even though they were dried fruits. A mix of golden raisins, green raisins, pineapple and cranberries. Not only it looked so colourful. It was a treat to the palate. We all know about the goodness of raisins and berries but how often we remember to use them? Only occasionally. Nutritionists and dieticians are often heard suggesting these as healthy options, so when they come in a snack pack,their usage is ensured by family and guests. These can also be used as add-ons in yoghurt, oatmeals, porridge, kheer and salads.
2. HONEY ROASTED CASHEW
These were an absolute tintillating treat for my tastebuds and were polished off sooner than all. Everyone who was served, loved the taste and it was addictive, nutritious and wholesome and even a little satiated that munch hunger pang.
The pack consisted of roasted cashews with yellow mustard seeds, chilly flakes, salt and honey glaze. They were mouthwatering and super yum and perfect to serve at party or at home. The fact that they are roasted makes them more healthy and they can be a good accompaniment with beverages.
3.KODO MILLET CRISPIES
This goodie pack was my most favourite of all. As it reminded me of a South Indian household and the elaborate preparations they make to cook up each savoury. It was a beautiful, typical homemade, authentic preparation. Just like the ones i have tasted many times at my South Indian friends’ home. You can’t get enough of this one and this will be a sure shot hit with everyone. Made of kodo millets, moong dal, rice flour, urad dal etc; they are fresh, tasty and crispiest to the core. You don’t worry about the calorie counts and other stuff while savouring these. They just make you happy, nostalgic and full.
4. OLD FASHIONED NUT MIX
This is a perfect mix pack of goodness and health and rich nutrition, often recommended by experts, to be snacked upon a handful a day. It is what its name suggests, an old fashioned nut mix, the healthiest to munch on. Its a mix of Roasted Peanuts, Pepper Cashews, Almonds, Walnuts. It would be a good snacking option on a regular basis for us and our families. Though I feel this lacks something in the taste department, I mean only the cashews are slightly salted, rest all nuts are blandly mixed. Well, We do try to include nuts in our daily routines, walnuts and almonds at least. Also, peanuts and cashews occasionally as well, but when we like to have it as a snack and that too from a brand like snack expert, we would like it to impress our tastebuds a little more.
5. CHOCOLATE FLAPJACK
This snack was a first timer for me. I had never tasted a flapjack before. Its a chewy bar or granola baked usually with rolled oats, jaggery, butter, choco chips whole orange and honey. Its almost like a modern twist to a traditional chikki. It did not appeal to me at first bite, but definitely grew onto me. I simply loved the goodness of ingredient infused with taste for the palate. I think kids and youngsters and health freaks would definitely grow onto this as its a trendy mildly sweet savoury with an attractive list of ingredients as well. It will serve as a perfect dessert to a meal and can keep a watch on the exceeding pressure, all the festivities and parties put on our poor waistline. All in all a big thumbs up to this innovation.